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15 April 2008 @ 06:43 pm
No regrets but...  
Sometimes when you choose a different path, even when you know it's the right one for you, it causes you to leave behind a lot of things you love.

Sometimes these "things" are people. They are people who understand why you've chosen your path and how it's different from theirs. But you know that as you walk along your path, and they theirs, you will diverge more and more. Eventually, you just won't have the same things in common anymore. You won't have the same things to talk about. You'll talk about your path and they will talk about theirs. Eventually, it just becomes too hard. There's too much apologetica. There's too much "I don't mean that your path is any less good but..." It just gets too hard. So you have less and less to talk about, less and less to share. And your lives diverge like your paths once did.

Sometimes I look back on my "path not taken" and I wave to my old friends there. I remember our times together and the fun we had when we were on the same path. I don't regret choosing the path I did. But man... Sometimes, I really miss them!
 
 
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arcadian72[info]arcadian72 on April 15th, 2008 10:51 pm (UTC)
Boy do I know exactly what you mean - and trying deperately to hold on to a form of friendship developed back then just doesn't work. If it doesn't bloom into something new, you have to let it go - miss them, remember the good times, and move on. Growing up sucks sometimes, doesn't it? I want to be 10 again and have no cares in the world. ;)
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kass_rants: Oh the shame![info]kass_rants on April 15th, 2008 11:05 pm (UTC)
Yeah. "You can never go home again," eh?
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Countess Adele[info]countess_adele on April 16th, 2008 12:07 am (UTC)
Man do I know what you mean. I have this friend I went to college with that was a very good fiend. We were two peas in a pod. Then differences and time passed and we drifted apart. We still see each other at fair, but our meetings are very strained. Somehow our friendship jumped ship on another course. I miss the times we spent talking art and doing art, but we both have grown into another directions. Life still gives us memories to share and knowledge to pass on at out meetings. And yes, I too miss those times Kass. Life moves as do time. What we grasp from each makes us the person are and will become.
Trying not to get too profound.....


Ady
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kass_rants[info]kass_rants on April 16th, 2008 01:27 pm (UTC)
Yeah. Exactly.
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loosecanon[info]loosecanon on April 16th, 2008 01:39 am (UTC)
friendivorce is one of the hardest things to work out in the world. Hugs
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kass_rants[info]kass_rants on April 16th, 2008 11:04 am (UTC)
It wasn't anything that concrete or on-purpose. It wasn't one specific friend or even a specific point in time when it happened. I just miss the people I used to know, with whom I used to share interests but they've diverged.
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loosecanon[info]loosecanon on April 16th, 2008 01:09 pm (UTC)
we all have it, I think more so when people have many diverse interests and evolve through several.
There are people I miss, but the times have changed and so have we.
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kass_rants[info]kass_rants on April 16th, 2008 01:26 pm (UTC)
Yeah. I don't regret the path I took, but I really miss the old times.
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the archaeologist's lackey: elinor takes a tea break[info]windrose on April 16th, 2008 04:58 am (UTC)
We grow, we change, and sometimes that means going in a different direction than the people we are close to. There are people I left behind when I moved out west that I'd once thought I'd spend the rest of my life with. But life didn't work out quite that way. They went their way, I went mine, and we were all happier for it.

When I got to California, I met new people, people I never would have known if I hadn't hauled myself out of the rut my life had become and taken that step into the unknown. And these people, these wonderful, generous, amazing people have become my true family. I am blessed, truly, to have such friends in my life.

But even though I have no regrets, I understand what you mean. At the time, it was hard to leave. But it would have been even harder to stay.
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(Anonymous) on April 16th, 2008 12:04 pm (UTC)
Yeah... I've only really remained in contact with one friend from college, though have reestablished contact with two others recently. That one person is the one I'm pretty sure will accept whatever I do or become without blinking or judging me. The rest... not so much. They were friendships of contingency, I guess.
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kraehe[info]kraehe on April 16th, 2008 12:17 pm (UTC)
That was me. (never mind...)
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kass_rants: smiley[info]kass_rants on April 16th, 2008 01:26 pm (UTC)
Yeah. I know. It just sounded like you. =)
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fiofiorina[info]fiofiorina on April 16th, 2008 12:56 pm (UTC)
The title - no regrets but... describes the feeling really well.
I think I know only too well what you mean.
It's when one starts to think, "Oh, we had such a merry time, and so many nice evenings with good food and laughter and good discussions.." and then discover that oneself has changed, and that other people change as well. Me, for example I miss my fellow Japanesestudents and/or Manga-Anime-Fanatics. But when ever I happen to meet them, I discover that we have less and less in common. Somehow it hurts that it doesn't hurt. (it ought to, when friendships just dillute, shouldn't it?)
Well - anyway - a broken egg cannot be mended, live goes on.
I chose my path as you did, and in my opinion live is too short (and too beautiful) to waste it to regrets.
Love from Switzerland
Alessandra
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kass_rants: smiley[info]kass_rants on April 16th, 2008 01:27 pm (UTC)
Hi Alessandra!

Yeah. No regrets, but I still miss those good times. You know what I mean.
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fiofiorina[info]fiofiorina on April 16th, 2008 02:43 pm (UTC)
I do.. I really do.
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(Anonymous) on April 23rd, 2008 04:39 pm (UTC)
I definitely agree Kass. I do miss the old times and from time to time I think about them and the fun that we used to have. But people come in and out of your life for a reason, either to help you through a certain point, or whatever it may be, and then they leave or they stay. It's unfortunate, but its life. I do miss the old times every so often...and I was glad that I got to experience the good times with the people I did...:)
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